Whats on my mind now

I've been feeling really good about the music that I've been making. TGD is about to drop and although i didn't record it in a million doller studio i feel real good about the future. when i play the songs its like wow i can really see what direction i wanna go with my music where as b4 i just did what i thought everyone wanted to hear! but now i feel like my mind is ten years ahead of my body i mean i know the sounds i wanna make its just doing it lol the hardest part about all of this is that Im doing mostly everything myself beats, hooks, writing, producing, like i've said 98% of the mixtape is all me emotions and all. Like Kanye said "i got treasures in my mind but couldn't open up my own vault" i feel like its taken me 19 years to realize the importance of exercising your mind and pushing you whole body to its full potential the older we get the more information we receive. And i dont mean just doing good in school i think ppl get so caught up in being in school b.c. of what it provides i mean you do good in school and you live a better life??? the problem that i have with that is most schools is that they don't encourage (or push) people to be creative like they do with other things. i think we are taught allot of pointless things when we should be taught how to have information to help us globally. (wishful thinking i guess) but on another note i worry about my relationship with god i havnt been talking to him like i use to NOT because i've been so busy with music but i guess its cause Im so wrapped up in handling all situations by myself i forget that i have help beyond the clouds. I know that when Im done with The Gateway Drug allot of doors will open up for me I mean my work ethic is there i just need a place to work hahahaha. someone asked me the other day way do i do music i said because i love it. music has gotten me through some of the worst times in my life. The darkest chapters in the book of Jordan Williams had crazy soundtracks to them, and now that I've started a new chapter Im learning the difference between left brain right brain and the ways of creative people vs those who are more intellectual. I find myself making music for those who don't use the same side of the brain as me and i get frustrated when they don't get me. i mean on day they will but usually when stuff like that happens the artist is ether dead or.....dead lol i guess thats why i record everything thats on my mind so that way theres no way nobody wont know how i felt before i left the earth....